


You are my sunshine  (New version)

by MentallyUnstable245 (orphan_account)



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Abuse, Aged-Up Character(s), Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - High School, Cutting, Depressed Dipper Pines, Grunkle Stan Has Issues, Human Bill Cipher, M/M, Self-Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-31
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2019-04-16 07:35:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 9,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14159889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/MentallyUnstable245
Summary: Dipper Pines has had a rough life, he has been bullied, abused, ignored. Then he meets a blond haired boy, who's name is Bill Cipher. Will things get better? Or will it all go downhill?





	1. Help! Anyone?

**Author's Note:**

> If you've read the old version of this story, you'll notice the first few chapters of this story are extremely similar to the old story, there are minor changes, but this first chapter is fine to skip if you've already read the old story

-Dippers POV-

 

I am running away, away from all of the pain and sorrow, away from all of the teasing and mockery, then suddenly I'm falling into a dark abyss, but it doesn't feel scary, it is warm and welcoming like the warm hugs that I used to get from my mother and father. The ones that I used to get…

I wake up suddenly from my dream and groan, today I have to go to school, I have to see those awful people. The ones that beat me up and shove me into lockers, just because I had kissed another guy. The guy was just using me to get his girlfriend jealous and now I get mercilessly bullied because of that one, fatal, mistake. The worst part of it is that my sister doesn't know about this, either she doesn't know or doesn't care. My parents also disowned me when they found out I was gay and they sent Mabel and I down to gravity falls to live with our Grunkle Stan.

The only reason that my used to be parents sent Mabel along with me is because the didn't want me to feel lonely, but my sister has other friends and I have no friends of my own, so I feel very lonely.

I finally get out of bed and start my daily morning routine, brush teeth, take shower eat breakfast, then walk to school. I always like to walk to school because it helps me gather my thoughts and mentally prepare myself for school. 

-Time skip to when he’s at school cuz I'm lazy-

I close my locker door and start to walk to my 1st class, I haven't hit any bullies yet, maybe today I won't have to deal with them. Suddenly my books got knocked out of my hands, “Loser” I hear someone say. I bend down to pick my books up and feel a sharp pain in my abdomen, the jerk kicked me, It took all of my willpower to not to curse them, but if I did they would beat me up even more. Gideon Gleeful and Robbie Valentino. They were by far the worst bullies. Most bullies just tripped me and called me a dork. These guys took it to the extreme, they would shove me in lockers, throw rocks, kick me, call me certain names that would not be used in a civilized conversation, once they even tied me to a tree and left me to get eaten by some wild animal. After cursing then for a couple of seconds I composed myself and headed to my 1st class, Chemistry.

I had always liked chemistry and I was good at it so it was a win-win situation. The only downside to chemistry this year was the teacher. He was so unbelievably boring and he was teaching us stuff that most 9th graders should know. Us being 11th graders were very bored, especially me, I had studied chemistry for a long time and I would probably do just fine in a college class. Since he was teaching us stuff that I already knew I just doodle in my notebook and stare out the window most of the time.

Finally I had gotten through that horrible first class, I went to my locker to switch out my books and suddenly was forcefully shoved into my locker, the door slammed shut and I heard it lock, i'm going to be stuck in here for the rest of the day shitshitshitshitshitshit, I took a deep breath and called myself down before I could have a panic attack, I was pretty used to being shoved in here so I had learned how to stay calm. All I had to do was call for help and hopefully somebody will be there right?

I started to call for help, slightly banging on the door so I don't get to out of breath, I continued to call for help until finally after what seemed like hours somebody called out to me “Hello is anybody here?” I let out a sigh of relief “Yes could you help me get out of here the locker combo is 11, 24, 2.” I waited for a response, instead of a response the door opened and I saw a blonde headed boy about my age, maybe two inches taller than me with bright golden eyes. “thank you so so much , I thought I was going to be locked in there forever” I took in a breath of fresh air 

“No problem, how did you even get locked into there anyways” He said smiling 

I sighed for about the millionth time today, “long story but don't worry, I'm used to it.” I replied, waving my hand dismissively 

He frowned, “You sure you don't want to tell me, I'll beat up whoever shoved you into that locker I swear” he put a fist I'm his hand to demonstrate 

I laughed, “No it's okay it happens a lot I'm fine” 

he frowned again but this time seemed to shake it off. “Wanna go grab an ice cream, we already missed 2nd class and half of 3rd, might as well take the day off what do you say” He extended his hand 

I looked at it, then looked up at him, “I don't even know your name” 

He laughed “The name's Bill, Bill Cipher, what's yours” 

I hesitated, “Dipper, Dipper Pines”


	2. Ice scream

-Bill's POV-

 

“Help! Help! Please somebody get me out of here!” 

I turned to the source of the sound, it was coming from a locker. “Hello, is anybody there?” I asked, to make sure I wasn't hearing things. 

I heard a sigh of relief then a response “Yes could you help me get out of here the locker combo is 11, 24, 2.” I entered the number and opened the locker. A ruffled looking brown haired boy came out, gasping for air.   
“Thank you so so much , I thought I was going to be locked in there forever” 

“No problem, how'd you even get locked in there anyways” I said, smiling 

He sighed, “Long story, but don't worry, i'm used to it.” He replied waving his hand dismissively

I frowned, “You sure you don't want to tell me, I'll beat up whoever shoved you into that locker I swear” I said, putting a fist into my hand to demonstrate 

He laughed “No it's okay it happens a lot I'm fine” 

I frowned again but this time I to shook it off. If he didn't want to talk he didn't have to talk. “Wanna go grab an ice cream, we already missed 2nd class and half of 3rd, might as well take the day off what do you say” I extended my hand.

he looked like he was pondering my offer then responded, “I don't even know your name.” 

I laughed, “The names Bill, Bill Cipher, what's yours?” 

He hesitated than said, “Dipper, Dipper Pines” He grabbed my hand and we went to my car.

***********

“Wow, this is your car? You must be rich” Dipper said, his eyes wide. I laughed, “Yeah, well I'm not rich, my parents are rich” Dipper was still looking at the car in awe.” I laughed again, he looked really cute. “Climb in” Dipper hurriedly opened the door and jumped into the car. “So you like it?” I said while climbing into the car. He looked at me, his eyes still wide. “ Are you kidding! This is awesome!” I laughed again, he was so adorable.  
I started the engine and we drove off.

When we got to the ice cream place, Dipper wasn't as excited as he was when he was at the car. I tried to start a conversation to lighten his mood, “So.. What's your favorite icecream flavor?” 

He looked at me suddenly, as if torn from his thoughts. “Huh? Sorry I kind of zoned out.” 

I smiled and repeated the question. He looked at the ground thinking, “I guess I like chocolate, what about you?” He said, looking back at me

I thought for a second, “Well I guess if I had to choose I'd go with cookie dough” 

He smiled slightly, “Ya, that's always pretty good” 

I ordered my ice cream, and he ordered his. “I’ll pay, don't worry” I said, getting out some cash

He looked at me with surprise, “Really?” 

“Ya why wouldn’t I?” I said with a small chuckle, 

He gave a small smile, “You just met me” 

I smiled again, he was so adorable. I should stop calling him adorable, I don't even know if he likes boys, I thought 

We went outside and sat on a bench, Dipper was staring at his ice cream but not eating it for some reason, ”Hey mate, you gonna eat that?” I asked, confused by his sudden change in mood.

He looked up, once again looking like he was torn from his thoughts, “Oh ya, u-unless you want it, I-I mean you paid for it so if you want it you can.” His words were rushed and filled with anxiety. Almost like he’s, afraid of something? I wonder what could be bothering him, whatever it is he's not very good at hiding it. 

“No no, I bought that for you, enjoy it” I said, trying to make my voice sound as soft and non-threatening as possible. I’ve seen some guys pick on him before, maybe he’s a bit wary of me. 

Dipper started eating his ice cream slowly. We stayed at the ice cream place for about an hour, chatting about stuff. Although he seemed to avoid all questions about family, and he spaced out quite a lot.

Once we got bored of the ice cream place, I asked Dipper where he wanted to go next.

“We can go to the forest” He suggested, looking at his hands while doing so. 

I was a bit worried about him, I know we just met but he seemed so distant and, a bit sad? I could tell he was trying to hide it. Maybe if he goes to the forest he’ll feel better, I thought

“Okay ya that sounds cool” I responded turning on the car and driving towards the forest.   
As soon as we arrived at the forest Dipper practically jumped out of the car and sprinted down a small trail. I had to run to keep up with him.  
When I finally caught up to him he was at a Waterfall, sitting against a tree with his eyes closed. I sat down next to him and we both enjoyed the moment. With the sound of a running waterfall and birds chirping it was like a small little paradise on earth. I could see why he liked it here. After a while he fell asleep, his head resting against my chest. I didn't mind, he was actually kind of adorable- wait, I have to stop calling him that- I soon followed suit, with my head resting against the tree and Dipper’s head on my chest I fell into a peaceful sleep.


	3. Walking alone

-Dippers POV-

 

A soft cold breeze made me wake up from my sleep. Too bad, it would be nice to sleep forever, I thought, starting to notice my surroundings. It looked like it was about 1:00 in the morning and I was in my favorite part of the forest, someone's hands were wrapped around my torso. I looked behind me. My eyes widened. Ohmylordbillsarmsarewrappedaroundme   
I slowly attempted to get up without waking Bill up. The attempt failed and Bill opened his eyes, suddenly aware of where we where and what position we were in.

“Shit, It’s like two in the morning I have to get home” He said quickly, releasing his grasp on my torso and blushing violently. 

“Your parents are probably worried sick about you, but make sure to get home safe, don't rush, ok” I said, getting up from my position on the floor. Bill doing the same.

“But what about you? You don’t have a car, how will you get home?” He asked, sounding genuinely worried 

I smiled, “It’s ok, my house is just a mile back that way” I said, pointing in the general direction of the shack

Bill looked where I was pointing, then looked at me, “Are you sure you’ll be ok? You don’t have a flashlight” 

I took out my phone, “I have a flashlight on here” 

He looked at my phone, “Ok, but call me or text me when you get home- wait, you don't have my number do you, ok here, do you have a pen?” He asked as he took out a crinkled up gum wrapper from his pocket

I nodded and handed him a pen I had in my pocket

“Nice, always prepared” He said as he wrote down his number on the gum wrapper

“Ok bye, see you tomorrow” He said, handing me the wrapper and my pen, then running to his car.

“Ok, bye” I responded, waving even though he couldn't see me. I then turned around and started to walk towards the shack, taking my time because I knew no one would notice that I was gone.

As I walked through the woods, thoughts of earlier raced through my head, I shouldn't’ve shown that much emotion. It’s easy to fake happiness for a little while, but then it gets. tiring. I sigh, why is Bill even ‘friends’ with me? I’m just a loser, he’s, probably just doing it out of pity. I’m so stupid, to think that I could actually ever have a real friend.

Sooner then I would like, I saw the shack, the sun had just barely started to rise, all the lights were off, I sighed, even though I knew they wouldn't wait up for me I had still hoped they would have at least left the porch light on or something. Tired and wanting to go back to sleep, I tried the door, the door didn't budge one bit. I tried it again, it still didn't move.

“fuck” I cursed under my breath. They didn't even bother to keep the door unlocked. I walked around the shack for a while until taking notice of the slightly cracked open window. It was low to the ground so I could easily climb through it.   
Once I got through the window I snuck upstairs and into my bed. Being careful as to not wake up Mabel and the others. I was a bit dirty, but it wasn't too bad. After awhile of tossing and turning in my bed I finally wore myself out and drifted into a soft sleep.


	4. Stay Away From Him

-Dipper POV-

 

“DIPPER THE BUS IS HERE!! DON'T BE LATE TO SCHOOL!” I heard my sister scream. Soon after the sound of a door slamming followed by a bus driving away could be heard. Sighing, I sat up, Maybe I could just skip school today… no one would notice… after a while I decided against it since it was not a good idea to get in trouble with Grunkle Stan   
I got washed up, then put on a Navy blue hoodie along with black skinny jeans, a watch and my signature pinetree cap.   
While putting on my shoes, I checked the time, 7:43  
Better hurry up, don't want to be late for hell, I thought while jogging down the stairs, then suddenly I was falling, landing on my wrist, my watch digging into it and sharp pain shooting through it. “Fucking shit stick on a dancing pole” 

I got up and searched the shack for some sort of gauze. After a few minutes of searching I found it and wrapped it around my wrist, It’s not broken, but I might need to rest it for a day or two

Once I got to school I rushed in a nd attempted to quickly grab my books, which took a bit of time considering my injured wrist,I started to go to class. As I was walking a foot jutted Out from the crowd, causing me to trip and fall, dropping my books in the process “Goddamnit!! Don't you swine have anything better to!” I cursed

Everybody laughed. Robbie came towards me,”Your such a pathetic loser, go kill yourself” he smirked as I glared at him, My eyes full of hatred. He laughed as he noticed my bandaged wrist, “Little faggot’s been getting himself into some trouble” He laughed once again as he stepped on my hand.

“Agh! FUCK!” I cursed once again, squirming around trying to get my hand out from under Robbie’s foot. Black spots were beginning to appear in front of me, When I heard a voice

“Stay Away From Him”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit short, but whatever


	5. I can't trust you

-Bills POV-

 

There was laughter coming from the hallway, curious, I went to go check it out. After pushing past a mob of people, I saw Pinetree, who was getting his hand stepped on by Robbie. Taking a step forward, I hissed “Stay Away From Him”

I took another step forward in an attempt to look intimidating, Robbie was about a foot taller than me but I could take him easily.

“Oh look the faggots got himself a boyfriend” Robbie laughed, stepping on Pinetree’s hand with more force.

Dipper writhed in pain, “Stop it you fucking swine!” He tried to take his hand away from Robbie’s foot, but with little success.

“I Said Stay Away From Him, do you need me to repeat it again.” I snarled, not even trying to keep my cool. 

The bell rang as Robbie smirked, “Ok, I’ll stay away from him.” He turned around and started walking away, before adding,”For Now” He laughed as he walked away.

Pinetree didn't get up from his position. He just laid on the floor completely limp.

I walked over and crouched down next to him, “P-pinetree?” I looked at his face, his eyes were rolled to the back of his head, only the whites of his eyes visible

I started to panic, “Pinetree, Pinetree, Dipper, Please” I exclaimed shaking him lightly, “the pain must've made him pass out” I whispered to myself, well no shit Sherlock, said a voice in the back of my head. “I have to get him to a doctor” I mumbled, scooping him up bridal style and taking him to my car

After driving to the hospital as fast as I could without breaking any laws, we arrived and I got pinetree a doctor. While waiting for someone to tell me anything about my pinetree, wait why did I call him mine, he’s not mine stupid brain.

Just then a lady with long charcoal black hair came into the room, “Are you Mason Pines friend?” She questioned, a smile plastered on her face

Mason? I thought Pinetree’s name was Dipper? Even though I was confused I said yes because the last name was Pines.

“Great! Mason’s awake now and since your the only one here with him you can see him” The lady stated pointing to a room with a clipboard she was holding

Without a second thought I bolted into the room, entering upon pinetree, who had his wrist in a cast and an ice pack on his head.

“Hey Bill, you didn't have to stay here you could’ve gone home” Pinetree remarked, giving a weak smile.

“What are you talking about Pinetree I care for you and you are hurt so now I need to take care of you.” I countered, walking next to pinetree and pulling up a chair to sit on

Pinetree looked at me and sighed, “Really Bill, it ok if you want to go home, I didn't even break any bones”

“No it's not ok. I will stay here until your family comes” I replied holding his uninjured hand.

He frowned and looked away from me,his ice pack falling off his head in the process. “Bill my family won't come.”

“Why not” I asked, my hand still holding his. 

“Because they have other things to worry about” He whispered, his voice barely audible 

“But they have to come eventually right?” I questioned, getting more and more confused by the moment.

“They probably won't even care that I’m in the hospital” He said, gaining control of his voice

“Well what about your parents? Even if your whole family doesn't come at least they have to” I said, trying to be as confident as possible

Pinetree took a deep breath and looked at me, “Ok, Bill I’m going to tell you something”

“You can tell me anything, I’m here for you” I reassured him,

He took another deep breath, “B-bill my parents disowned me”

I looked at him, shocked by this information, “What about the rest of your family” I whispered

Tears had started to form in his eyes, but he was trying to hold them in, “My sister and I live with our Grunkle, but he only likes my sister” 

I cupped his cheek, gently wiping away tears that had started to fall down his face, “It’s ok, I care about you and i’m here for you” I whispered soothingly

Tears had started to stream down his face now, and he buried his face into my chest and wrapped his arms around me

“R-really?” he asked, pulling away from me 

“Yes, I swear” I reassured him reaching out to place my hand on his shoulder 

He pulled away from my touch, “H-how do I know your not lying to me” 

“I would never lie to you,” I said, confused by his sudden mood switch, “You can trust me”

“Nothing good ever comes from trusting  
people” He muttered, his eyes filled with distrust

“I swear you can trust me” I pleaded, wanting to help pinetree

“Can I just have a couple minutes to myself” He mumbled

“Ok” i said simply, even though I was sad and confused, i didn't want him to know.

“Thanks” He whispered, looking away from me

I looked at Pinetree, then turned and exited the room

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are always appreciated! ^-^


	6. Who else would take you home?

-Dipper POV-

 

I looked away from Bill, not wanting to see his sad face, his footsteps faded away and just like that he was gone

I broke down, tears streaming down my face, “Why am like this,” I whispered, tears freely flowing down my face. I cried until there were no more tears left to shed.

“W-why couldn't I j-just trust him?” No, he’s just your friend because he pities you, you're a worthless piece of trash, why would anyone want to be friends with you, said a voice in the back of my head, I sniffled, laying down and curling up into a ball. A couple more silent tears ran down my face and soon I drifted into sleep.

-Bill POV-  
I left the room, tears threatening to fall down my face. Since Pinetree didn't have a ride home, I sat in the waiting room, “What did I do wrong?” I muttered under my breath. Tears started to fall down my face. I buried my hands into my face, attempting to hide my tears. Soon I couldn't hold the tears back and I started to sob. Nobody came to comfort me, they just stared and then quickly looked away, ‘this must be what Pinetree feels like all the time’, I thought crying even harder, “I didn't even notice,”  
I remembered when we were at the ice cream place, and he was surprised that I was paying for him. How he seemed to be down all of a sudden, like some bad memories had popped up and they were bringing him down. I sobbed harder and didn't try to hide it, I sobbed until I couldn't anymore. By the time I had composed myself, the sun was just starting to set. I pulled out my phone and sent a quick text to my dad  
*My friend needs some help with his homework so I'll be home late*  
Putting away my phone I sat up and stretched, my eyes felt puffy and my stomach was rumbling, in other words, I felt like crap. I looked around the place which was nearly empty spare a few unfortunate souls who ended up here for one reason or another. Quickly spotting a vending machine, I walked over and got a granola bar. While I was heading back to my seat, my phone buzzed. I pulled it out of my pocket and saw that my dad had responded.  
*Ok*  
I quickly texted back  
*Thx*  
Sitting back down I opened my snack and ate it quickly. I put my head back and closed my eyes taking in the sterile sent of the hospital. For awhile I just stayed like that, enjoying the almost silence of the hospital, until a someone tapped my shoulder, causing me to snap my eyes open and bolt upright, turning my head to see who had tapped my shoulder. 

Dipper was in front of me, his wrist and hand wrapped with grey coloured wrap. “You really didn't have to stay” he said looking down at the floor. 

I gave a weak smile, “Of course i did, who else would take you home” I stood up and beckoned him to follow me, he continued to look at the ground, 

“ You really didn't have to stay, it's already dark, I could've walked home”

I sighed, “Come on, it dark you can't walk home” I started to walk towards the door, hoping he would follow me, to my surprise he did, looking at the ground while walking. We got into the car and I drove towards his house

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Posted on April fools day because having a regular updating schedule is a joke


	7. Filthy boy

-Dippers POV-

After I woke up the doctors let me go after telling me I didn't break anything, but i would need to rest my hand for about four days. I was about to walk home when I saw Bill sitting in the waiting room, leaning his head back with his eyes closed. Curious as to why he was still here, I walked over and tapped on his shoulder causing him to jump in surprise. I looked down at the floor, embarrassed to look him in the eye. He didn't have to stay here, he shouldn't have stayed here. I tried to tell him that but he walked away, obviously expecting me to follow, reluctantly I did, getting in his car and preparing myself for some sort of beating from my grunkle. The drive was silent, neither of us saying a word until we got to the mystery shack, when I mumbled out a small thanks to Bill for driving me.

He drove off, leaving a dust trail behind him. I turned around and took a deep breath, the lights were still off in the mystery shack but there was still a chance someone was awake. Pulling myself together, I walked towards the door and turned the doorknob, to my surprise it opened making a small creak in the process and I stepped in. All the lights were off and the tv wasn't on. Breathing a sigh of relief, I started to walk up the stairs, each stair made a loud creaking noise when stepped on, so I hoped that no one could hear. Just then I heard a door open and close then a raspy voice, 

 

“Who's there! I Have a bat and I'm not afraid to use it!” My breathing hitched in my throat, realizing who it was I braced myself 

 

“It’s just me Grunkle Stan! It’s Dipper!”   
I heard my grunkles footsteps getting closer and I braced myself once again. 

“Oh, then I guess it means that it really is nobody” he said, chucking. As he got closer I could feel in my gut that this was going to end badly. “What’d you do to you arm, fag” Stan said suddenly rushing towards me and grabbing me by my shirt. “That better not be on my card, because I assure you if it is, you'll be the one paying” He spit, his breath reeked of alcohol, he had been drinking. 

“D-don’t worry, the hospital paid for it” I managed to sputter out. Stan scowled at me, then dropped me making sure I felt the fall.

“filthy boy” he snarled at me one last time before turning around and going back to his room. I heard a door open and shut again. Sighing in relief for about the hundredth time today, I worked my way upstairs, making sure to be as quiet as possible. Once I had made it up the stairs and snuck into mine and Mabels room without waking anyone else up, I changed into some nightclothes and settled into my bed, embracing the warmth of my covers. Soon I settled into a deep dreamless sleep.


	8. Fuck off

-Dipper POV-

 

When I woke up, it was dark out. The moonlight was leaking through the window, causing the room to be slightly illuminated.  
Sitting up, I stretched, letting out a yawn. “What time is it” I mumbled, reaching for my watch. 3:40 ‘I only have to wait a couple of hours until the sun rises’ I thought laying back down. ‘Maybe I could sleep more’ I thought closing my eyes and attempting to get comfortable. Thoughts were racing through my mind, why did Bill want to drive me home? He could've just left, it would’ve been fine for me to walk home, maybe I could’ve jumped off a cliff or something, no one would care, my parents wouldn't care, my ‘grunkle’ wouldn't care, I know for a fact my sister wouldn't care. I rolled over, seeing Mabel sleeping peacefully. I sighed and rolled back over. If only I had her life, i would have friends and places to be, and I wouldn't be abused. Although I do deserve it. I’m just a worthless piece of shit who can't do anything. Maybe I should kill myself.

I lied in bed for hours unable to get any sleep, my thoughts getting darker and darker with each passing hour. Soon I could see the first bits of sunshine peeking through the window. 

After what I assumed was another hour, I heard Mabel roll over. I closed my eyes and steadied my breathing so it would look like I was sleeping. Mabel seemed to pay no mind, as she just mumbled, “Dipper, get your ass up, It’s a school day.” In return I rolled to the side facing opposite her, pulling the covers over my head. She seemed to not care, and I could soon hear the sound of a shower running. 

After a couple minutes of contemplating whether or no to get up, I rolled out of bed and went into a spare bathroom we had, bringing my dark red hoodie and black skinny jeans with me. 

***********

Once I got to school, I went around back to the courtyard to be greeted by Bill, who was sitting on a nearby tree branch

“Hey there pinetree! Didn't know you came too school this early” He said, waving.

I checked my watch, there was still a half hour before school started,“It’s not that early” I responded, “And why are you calling me pinetree?” 

Bill pointed to my cap, it had a pinetree on it, I had forgotten I put it on. And why is Bill talking to me, i’m a terrible person, i hate myself, so why doesn’t he hate me? 

Bill jumped out of the tree, landing on his feet with a soft thud. “You wear a pinetree hat, and your last name is Pines, It’s pretty funny actually” 

I rolled my eyes and smiled, “ya, ya ok you, uh, dorito” damnit, I have to be witty and pretend to be happy, this is going to suck, I thought, well, he’ll probably abandon you just like everyone else, so don't worry another voice said. 

Bill and I hung out in the courtyard until, I felt something solid hit my arm. I heard familiar laughing and then felt another solid thing hit me. Looking for the source of this, I saw Robbie and Gideon laughing their asses of with a pile of rocks next to them.

I looked at Bill, who was telling a story of some kind, “let’s get out of here” I said as I stood up, not looking at Robbie and Gideon Robbie threw another rock at me.

“Hey fag! You scared of us or something!” Robbie yelled, throwing another rock, this time it hit the back of my neck.

I took a deep breath, but before I could say or do anything I heard Bill, “Fuck off, you twats, why do you even pick on Dipper anyway? Is it because you need to pick on other people to make yourself feel tough?” I grabbed his wrist, and started to drag him away, but he wouldn't budge, and before I could talk some sense into him, Robbie was already in front of him, eyes full of hatred. 

Robbie looked at me, “So the little faggot got himself a boyfriend huh?” 

I looked down at my feet, and tugged a Bills wrist. 

Bill didn't seem to want to leave though, “Ya, so what if he’s got a boyfriend, are you jealous because you don’t have one,” Bill retorted, wrapping his arm around my shoulder and pulling me closer to him. 

Robbie looked offended,”Why would I be jealous of him? I’m not a piece of trash homo!” He spit on the ground in front of us and walked away. The bell ringing as he did so.

I turned towards Bill, “Thanks, you really didn't have to do that.” 

He smiled, “No problem, we have second together right? Language studies?”

I nodded

“Ok, see you then” He smiled and hugged me. Then ran off to first class

************  
First class went by like a blur and before I knew it, second class was beginning.

“Okay children, I’ve created a seating chart for you guys” She coughed and murmured something about ships.

“So Anthony here, Tiffany here, Rebecca here, John here”….she set up the seats, mostly in boy girl order, but there was the occasional girl girl and boy boy. “Ok then Dipper here and Bill here” She said, pointing to two desks next to each other. I grabbed my bag and moved to where she pointed Bill doing the same.

Great, now I have to act happy in this class too, I thought, Bill sat down in his seat and shot me a smile. I smiled back.

“Okay class today we are going to start a new topic!” the teacher began, clapping her hands together, her dark brown eyes sparkling. None of us responded to her in any way, so she just flashed us a crooked smile and continued talking, “Okay well today we are going to be learning Latin!” She said smiling even wider and walking to the storage room, her long red hair swaying with every step she took. She took out a bunch of textbooks from the storage, all of them were labeled “A Beginners Guide to Latin” I sighed, this was going to be a boring class. I already know Latin really well, I know more Latin than English. I sighed again and rested my head on my hand, only half listening to what the teacher said

The teacher smiled at is again, “Okay, so is there anyone in here who already knows some Latin” She said, scanning the classroom, I timidly raised my hand, she spotted me, and cheerfully said, “ Yes, Dipper! You know some Latin!?” 

“Ya, I...I know a bit” was my response 

The teacher didn't seem to mind my stammering, seeing as I never raise my hand in class, “Go ahead and say something, doesn't matter what it is” 

“Umm..ok….Salve, unde omnis?(Hello, how is everyone?)” I managed to say

The teacher clapped again, “Great job, maybe you can help tutor some of the other students here huh?” 

I scratched the back of my neck, “Um, sure, maybe.” 

She smiled again before turning back to the class and beginning to teach them the basics of latin. I didn’t bother to take notes or anything, I just doodled in my notebook and occasionally answered questions that the teacher asked me.

I heard the bell ring and got my bag to go to the next class before I heard Bill, “Hey, pinetree, I, uh..I need help with the Latin homework.” He said.

I turned around to face him, there was a light blush on his cheeks for some reason, “Ya, ok, we'll meet tomorrow after school?” 

“Ya ok, sounds great” he responded, still blushing slightly, in the back of the room you could hear the teacher squealing and muttering something about her ‘otp becoming cannon’ whatever that meant.

With that we both took our bags and headed for our next class.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't actually know Latin I used Google translate so if the Latin is crap sorry


	9. Wait, what

Dippers POV

I pace around nervously on the pavement of the school courtyard while scrolling through my tumblr and checking the time. Bill was supposed to be here 10 minutes ago. He’s probably just running late, I tell myself. What if he ditched because he didn't want to see my face? I take a deep breath, no he probably just got held up by a teacher, right? Right. He would never ditch. I sigh and take a seat on the bench next to me. While taking out the Latin textbook from my backpack I hear someone's footsteps, they sound like they’re running. I look up from my bag and see Bill running towards me, with his Latin textbook in arms. 

He reaches me, gasping for air, “ Sorry...for..being so...late” He takes a seat next to me.

I wait for him to catch his breath. “ I don’t mind. “ It’s true, being at home-if I could even call it that- sucks. When i’m at home all Grunkle Stan does is yell and beat me. It’s worse when he’s drunk. Thinking back on all the times he’s hit me or called me worthless, I sigh, wishing I could just run away from that awful place. I’m pulled out of my thoughts when I hear Bill.

“Hey, dude, you ok?” He asks, sounding genuinely concerned. “ You kinda seemed lost in thought”

I look at him, how could he even talk to me, why is he even talking to me, “ Oh, ya i’m fine.” I open my Latin textbook. “Ok so, Latin, right.”

“Uh, ya, It’s kinda embarrassing though, I can’t even understand basic Latin.” He said, scratching the back of his head, a pink dust falling on his cheeks.

I smile at him, “Not really, I mean, Latin is a really hard language to learn. Any language is hard to learn.” 

He opened his textbook to the page i was on, “K, teach. What's up with Latin.” He said smiling.

I smile back and began to teach him some basic Latin roots, something I noticed the teacher skipped over.

~time skip~

Bill checked the time on his phone. “ Well guess it’s time to go.” He said, shoving his textbook in his bag then slinging it over his shoulder

I struggled to get my books back into my backpack, since I still had to give my hand rest.

Bill chuckled, “You need some help with that?” He asked, helping me with the books without waiting for a response.

I put the bag over my shoulder and stood up, Bill doing the same.

“K, well, see you tomorrow?” I said about to turn around and leave.

Suddenly Bill grabbed my good wrist and pulled me closer to him, so that our faces were almost touching. My face turned scarlet,”Bill what are you doin-” Bill softly placed his lips on mine, his lips sitting perfectly on my own. I stood there, stiff for a couple of seconds before kissing back, using my good arm to run a hand through his silky golden hair. He wrapped a arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him and deepening the kiss. 

Suddenly he pulled away, face a deep red, “K then see you tomorrow!” He turned and ran away

I stood there shocked at what had just happened. Bill kissed me, why did he kiss me? What is he trying to do, what does he want? I’m just a worthless nobody, he must be using me for something.

I walked back home, thoughts racing through my head.


	10. *sigh*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone's wondering why I deleted the last chapter I posted, its because I posted the wrong chapter. So ya, sorry

-Dippers POV-

 

I open the door to the house, only to be greeted by some broken glass on the floor and a probably drunk Stan sitting on on the couch with the TV on. 

I sigh and step over the glass. Then I proceed to quietly walk to the stairs. 

Stan hears me, “HEY FAGGOT, WHY ARE YOU HERE” 

I turn around, sensing that he was in a angry mood, “I-i live here” was all I managed to mutter 

Stan took a step towards me, with a empty beer bottle in hand and eyes full of drunken anger, “EVERYONE HATES YOU! NOBODY WOULD CARE IF YOU KILLED YOURSELF” 

I turned around, bracing myself for whatever was about to happen next.

Stan took the beer bottle and smashed it against my back, causing me to emit a strangled cry and tears to fill my vision.

“GO TO YOUR FUCKING ROOM YOU FAG, YOU'RE LUCKY YOU EVEN HAVE A ROOM!” Stan pushed me onto the ground “GET UP YOU FUCKING USELESS PIECE OF SHIT!”

I got up quickly, wiping my tears, and ran to my room, almost falling down the stairs in the process. I prayed Stan wouldn't follow me

Once I got to my- well mine and Mabel’s- room, my prayers seemed to be answered, as I heard no footsteps or noises of any other kind. I curled up in a ball on my bed, why did I have to be so useless, I don't even have the guts to stand up for myself. I sat myself in a upright position. As I did so I noticed a small shiny object on the other side of the room. As i walked over to it, I saw that it was one one mabel’s razor blades that she uses for her art projects. She wouldn't notice if I took it.

I listened for any footsteps, there were none. Mabel was probably at a party or something, she had friend to hang out with at those things. Quickly, I grabbed the blade off the table and went into the bathroom, making sure to lock the door.

I slumped to to the floor, tears now streaming down my face, and I rolled up the sleeve of my hoodie, revealing my small pale wrist. Taking the blade in my bandaged up hand, I pressed it up against my skin, making a horizontal cut, deep enough to leave a small trail of crimson blood in its place. Silent tears rolled down my face as I repeated the action multiple times, soon creating a bloody mess on my wrist and the blade. I cleaned up the blade with water, rinsing off any blood. Then I started to wash my wrist, it stung a bit, but my wrist was mostly numb. It felt nice, just a small distraction. Once I had rinsed off my wrist, I bandaged it up using a old tee shirt that was way too small for me, which says something as I’m about as small as a stick. 

Soon my tears had dried up, leaving nothing but stains where they had once traveled. I layed down on my bed listening to ‘let me die’ by ‘lil happy lil sad’ I closed my eyes and whispered the lyrics to myself

Feeling lost and I don’t know where to go now~

I don’t really have a place to call my home now~

Everybody hating and I feel so cold now~

Why does everybody make my feel alone now~

I whispered myself to sleep, with newly formed tears on my face.

 

If anyone wants to listen to the song here's the link: https://youtu.be/ABZ9v4Y--AQ It’s the nightcore remix and I think it sounds pretty good

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Link to the song if anyone wants it:
> 
>  
> 
> https://youtu.be/ABZ9v4Y--AQ


	11. Can we be friends?

-Dippers POV-

An alarm clock screamed at me to wake up, I didn't set an alarm so I assumed it was Mabels. As I turned around to see where the sound was coming from, I saw Mabel walking to turn it off. 

“Dipper! Get up! Stop acting so fucking emo” She said as she pressed off the alarm. 

I rolled out of bed, “I’m not fucking emo, what time is it” I said, rubbing my eyes and sighing.

“It’s 7:30, so get your emo ass up” She said throwing a pillow at me and walking out of the room

I sighed and got up, at least she bothered to wake me up today I thought as I, went into the shower, shedding my nightclothes and bandage, then stepping into the warm stream of flowing water. 

As I stepped in I was reminded of the cuts on my wrists and the bruises on my back. Each droplet of water that hit them sent a sharp pain through the wounds. I deserve this pain, I thought, tears starting to form in my eyes. No I can't be a wimp, I have to stop crying. 

I took a deep breath and exhaled, turning off the water as I did so, then proceeding with the same old morning routine that I did every single day. Today’s outfit was a plain grey hoodie and olive jeans, along with black vans and my signature pine tree cap.

I walked out the door of the mystery shack, not bothering to grab breakfast. As I walked to school I remembered the events of yesterday, how Bill kissed me. Why would he do that, what does he have to gain? These thoughts went through my head until I arrived at the school, the place was completely empty. So I went around to an small ally that was between the main building and the west wing. Sitting there I listened to my playlist, which mostly contained my chemical romance and pierce the veil, while doing some math homework. 

After a while, the school filled up and everyone was talking in their social groups I decided to get out from my hiding place and grab my books. As I was walking to my locker, someone out their foot out in front of my, causing me to trip, and my books to fall out of my bag. 

I sighed, “Well, today's going just fucking spectacular” I muttered as I began to grab my books.

“Hey, you need some help with those books?” A unfamiliar voice said, kneeling down and grabbing some for me. 

I looked up to see a dark purple haired boy, maybe a year or two older than me, handing me my fallen books, “Thanks, umm, you really didn't have to do that” 

“Nonsense, It’s no problem” He said smiling and getting up, then extending his hand out to me

I hesitantly took his hand, and got up, “I...umm..my..my name's Dipper” I said, stumbling over my words

The purple haired boy smiled again, “My name's Tad Strange” 

I faked a smile, “Nice to meet you Tad, I have to go to class now” I said, walking away

“Okay, nice to meet you!” He said, walking in the opposite direction as well. 

I got into first, and it passed without much happening. 

Soon, first was over, and I had to face the fact that I was sitting next to Bill in second.  
Maybe I could just skip it, no one would notice, I already know latin and the teacher’s pretty cool.

I decided to skip it

While I was waiting for that class to go by, I hid in the alley that I was in this morning. I listened to music and watched some anime. I was pretty fun actually. Soon, the bell rang signaling for third class. I got up, and walked to third, which happened to be ‘advanced calculus’ this class was the most fun because it was actually a challenge, something to make me forget about everything. 

The third class was over sooner then I would’ve liked it too be, and the bell rang, this time signaling lunch. I grabbed my books a sighed, I was starving, but I didn't have any much money and I couldn't bring a lunch from home, Stan would beat me for using any of the groceries. 

I walked over to the back of the school, a place where only a few stoners went to get high. As I turned the corner, I noticed nobody was there, good, I thought, hoping I could watch a bit more anime. 

I sat down on the floor and was about to put in my headphones when I heard a familiar voice, “Hey, pinetree, why are you here all alone?” 

I looked up to see Bill standing next to me, leaning on the wall, “Why weren’t you in class today” Bill said, with almost a hint of concern? 

“I..I..just didn't feel like going” I replied, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible

Bill sat down next to me, “So, you weren’t avoiding me?” 

Why, does he care if I was avoiding him or not, “Bill, why do you talk to me” I said tears forming 

“what? I-i like you” Bill responded 

“Why, I’m just a worthless nobody, why would you like me, what are you trying to gain” At this point tears had started to fill my vision, and they were threatening to fall down. 

Bill wrapped his arms around me, “You're not a worthless nobody, you mean everything to me” 

I pulled away from his grasp, he’s lying to you, he doesn't care about you, he just wants to humiliate you, just like everyone else, said a voice in my head, he wouldn't care if you killed yourself

“How do I know that your not lying” I said, wiping the tears that had begun to fall down my face. 

“Please, Dipper, just, try to trust me, I really like you, can't you see that, It’s ok if you don't trust me right now but, please, just, give me a chance” By now tears had begun to form on his face and he was wiping them with the sleeve of his shirt. 

I hesitated for a while, maybe he is telling the truth? No it's all just an elaborate show, he’s acting, why would he care about you when your own sister doesn't even care about you, another voice in my head said, No, I should just give him a chance, he’s been pretty nice so far,

“Pinetree?” Bill ripped me away from my thoughts, “So, can we be friends?” 

I took a shaky breath, “Ya, ok...i think we can be friends” I put on the most believable smile I could muster. 

“That's good” Bill said, stepping towards me and enveloping me in a big hug, “I’m glad we can be friends”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments a kudos are always appreciated! ^-^


	12. Am I dead yet

-Dippers POV-

Bill and I hung out together everyday from then on, we talked and laughed. We became closer, there was still a voice, telling me that he would eventually leave me, abandon me, because I'm just a worthless nobody and I don't deserve friendship. A part of me believes it, and I started to cut more. It's really easy pretending to be happy. And sometimes, just sometimes I actually am happy. 

••••••••••••••••

I sat in a tree, doing some reading 

“What’s up Pinetree!” Bill called,

I looked up from my book, “Hey” I replied, smiling a bit

Bill, smiled back, and began climbing the tree. Once he had gotten up, he grabbed my book and looked at the back cover. 

“Hey!” I said, attempting to grab the book out of his hands

“Is this a romance novel?” Bill said, paging through the book

“N-no! Now give it back!” I said, blushing furiously and once again attempting to grab the book out of his hands, this time successfully

“I didn't know you were into romance” Bill teased, wiggling his eyebrows and scooting closer to me. 

“Shut up, I'm not, into romance” I said, pulling my hat down over my face to hide my blush and lightly pushing him.

“Yes you are. I can see you blushing” He laughed, putting a arm around my shoulder

“S-shut up” I said, crossing my arms

“Okay, sure, you're not into romance” He said, putting air quotes around the last three words. 

“I’m not” I said, turning my face away from him.

“Ya, ya, now let's get to class, the bells gonna ring soon” He said, jumping out of the tree

I followed suit, grabbing my bags and following him.

••••••••••••••

The teacher rambled on about Latin while I doodled in my notebook

“Ok, who can translate this sentence?” The teacher said, scanning the classroom before landing her eyes on me, “Dipper, how about you” 

I looked up, there was a sentence on the board in Latin. “Um ok” I translated the sentence with ease. 

The teacher smiled, “Great!” She continued on with her lesson.

This went on for about an what felt like forever until the bell finally rang. 

I put my books in my bag and hoisted it onto my back, then waiting for Bill to do the same.

We walked out of class together then went our separate ways, seeing as Bill had a different class than me.

As I was walking, Robbie appeared suddenly and shoved me against a locker.

“H-hey, let me go” I said, trying to squirm out of his grasp

“Faggot, why won't you kill yourself” He said, spitting in my face 

I looked away, “M-maybe I'll kill you” I said, attempting to be intimidating, even though Robbie could actually kill me 

He laughed, “So the fag’s growing some balls, why don't you grow enough balls to kill yourself” He said smirking, “You know no one would care, or even notice” He said, seeing he was getting to me 

Tears were threatening to spill, but I had to stay strong, “Shut up! You're such a fucking asshole” I screamed, throwing him off guard and breaking out of his grip 

He got back on guard, venom filled his eyes, “Now you're going too far” He grabbed me my the wrist and slammed me into the lockers, causing me to hiss in pain. Robbie stepped back, “You know, I’d kill you, but it'd be much more satisfying to have you kill yourself” He said, smirking and walking away

As soon as he walked away I ran into the nearest bathroom and started crying. “He’s right, I should kill myself” I decided, wiping my tears as I got up.

I ran to the shack, tears beginning to stream down my face again. I made a decision.

Once I got into mine and Mabels room, I grabbed a razor from under my bed. Then went to the bathroom, locking the door behind me. 

I pulled up my sleeve, revealing a scared arm, I put the razor to my skin cutting horizontally and leaving a small bloody trail behind. I know I need to cut vertically, and I need to cut a vein. 

Before taking another slash at my wrists, a thought hits me, I need to explain this to Bill. Taking a little piece of paper and a pen out of my pocket, with my hand shaking, I write a note, and leave it next to the sink.

I turn back to my wrist, am I really gonna do this? I press the blade up against my wrist, this time vertically, and where I know a vein will be.

I close my eyes, and press deeper into my skin, the taking a shaky breath, I slid the blade in one quick movement. I can feel it penetrate the vein, my wrist feels like it's on fire. It feels good, in a strange way.

I go to the other wrist and do the same thing, I then unlock the door and lay down on the floor, enjoying my last few moments before the world fades to black


	13. And

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Make sure to watch the first part of this   
> (Although most of you probably know this song)
> 
> https://youtu.be/5TUzB2fBUpY

-Bills POV-

The bell rings for the end if 3rd class, I walk over to Pinetree’s locker, where he usually goes after 3rd. I don't see him, only Robbie, standing were my Pinetree usually stands. He smirks, “Hey faggot number two, might wanna go check up on your boyfriend”

Something in my gut tells me that something’s wrong, I run out of school and get into my car, then I call pinetree, hoping he will pick up, he doesn't, I call again, no answer. 

I feel like something bad happened. Putting the car into drive I speed to Pinetree’s house. Quickly exiting my car and entering the house through a window that's always open, I run upstairs, assuming that's where the bedrooms are.

I open the first door, I see two twin sized beds, one side is decorated brightly with with and posters and shiny objects, the other is decorated more blandly, with only one Black parade poster. 

I quickly step into the room and look for any signs of life. There is a door, that I assume leads to a bathroom.

I slowly open the door, there I see Dipper, surrounded by a pool of blood, he’s clutching a razor. I get on the floor next to him and check for a pulse, there is barely one. 

I grab my phone and call an ambulance, telling them the situation and the address. 

I get up from the floor and notice a paper next to the sink, in extremely shaky print, it reads, 

Bill,  
I'm sorry, I couldn't do it anymore. I wish you the best.

It ends there, I start sobbing. I go back to the floor, and hold Dipper in my arms until the ambulance arrives and takes him away. They tell me to follow them in my own car. I do.

Once I get to the hospital. I rush to where Dipper is. The doctors tell me to wait outside, they will try their best to save him, but it's not looking good. 

After about an hour of pacing back and forth. A doctor comes out, I can see on his face what he’s going to say. 

I start to sob even more, “C-can I a least see him?”

The doctor nods and apologizes for not being able to save Dipper.

I don't hear the apology though, I just rush into the room dipper is in.

I see him, his face is pale, and he has bandages on his arms. A steady stream of tears continues down my face. Why did he have to die. Why didn't I notice He was in pain.

I sit down next to him and brush his hair. Tears are still streaming down my face. I try singing to him, even though I know he'll never hear me.

You are my sunshine~

 

My only sunshine~

 

You make me happy~ 

 

When skies are grey~ 

 

I choke back a sob

You'll never know dear~

 

How much I love you~ 

 

So please don't take~ 

 

My sunshine away~


End file.
